Monday, December 14, 2015

What Happens at Christmas...

I have typed the first word of this post about four times now.  I don't know where to start.  The Santa party was only 2 days ago but it seems so much longer.  Mom has not eaten now for 3 days.  She sleeps continuously.  She has forgotten how to drink so I have been swabbing her mouth with a wet cloth.  She still has her sense of humor though.  As I was swabbing, she awoke for a second....long enough to say "watch out or I'll bite you", before closing her eyes and going back to sleep.

Mom on Thursday

Mom came home last Wednesday afternoon and was on a great upswing.  I got many phone calls asking about the Santa party on Saturday and the Parish Council party tonight that were scheduled here at our house.  I said both were a go because it seemed as if we were going to have months or at least weeks with Mom.  Thursday was a great day with Mom joining us for each meal and having a shower.  Friday, Mom got out of bed for breakfast and that was the last meal she had.  She hasn't been out of bed again except to go to the bathroom and now she can't even do that.

Mom on Saturday

The Santa party was a success and everyone got a chance to see Mom although mostly she just slept. Yesterday, I went to Mass in the morning and explained to Fr. Slaton the condition of my Mom so he came yesterday afternoon, had a Mass, gave her Communion and the anointing of the sick.  She slept through most of it but was able to take Holy Communion and even said "that was nice".  John and Kirsten came over after Mass to spend time with Mom and Kirsten and I made the stuffed cabbages and kielbasa and kraut for tonight's party.  

This morning I realized that I want to stay near Mom and entertaining isn't going to be an option for me.  My friend, Pam, who is our parish secretary is checking with fellow council member, Midgie to see if we can move the party to her house as she had offered on Wednesday.  I will pack up the food into crockpots and have it delivered to her house for the rewarming before the party.  Pam is also making arrangements for someone else to handle my night at the food pantry and the Christmas basket distribution.

So now it is just a waiting game.  I am content to sit here in my room with Mom for the time we have left together.  I am grateful that she is still pain free and very little distress that I am able to relieve just by petting her and talking to her.  

I finished reading "What Happens at Christmas" (kind of ironic, huh).  It was a free download from nook for the Christmas season and it was silly, and fun, and perfect for this busy time of year when you want to pass the time but don't want to have to think at all.  It is the story of a dysFUNctional family.  Camille has always dreamed of marrying a prince and now that she has found one she is determined to show him a traditional "family" Christmas, even if it means hiring actors to portray that family.  Unexpectedly her family and her one true love return home during this farce.

As I was writing that last paragraph, Mom awoke and said she wanted to get up and use the bathroom.  I told her I thought she was to weak to get out of bed and she said "watch me" so I got her up and  "watched her".  She is one tough lady...

Now I am going to sit down with Mom and read some more.  The selection for this month's Cook the Books is A Place at the Table by Susan Rebecca White. I started it last night and am enjoying it thus far...I will be reviewing it for you and making a dish inspired by it when I am finished.  The deadline is not until the end of January so you have plenty of time to pick up the book and join us if you would like.

I would like to finish this post by sharing this song written and performed by Mark Schultz.  Every time we lose someone, especially this time of year, it makes it a Different Kind of Christmas.


  1. The song is so calming isn't it? I am so sad to hear how much your mom has declined since you brought her home. But think of what a wonderful Christmas she will have if she gets to join your dad and brother in the most wonderful place in the world!! Sending hugs, Wendy!!

  2. Wendy, My heart aches reading what you're going through. My mom is caring for her mother right now and going through the same situation, just not quite at this stage yet. We all know it's coming though. I pray for comfort for your mom, and for you, and for the strength you need to get through this season. Particularly as Tim and I go home to seem my mom and grandmother, you will be on our minds and hearts. God bless.

    1. Thanks so much Sarah and I will keep your Mom and Grandma in my thoughts and prayers.

  3. Will keep your mom, you and your family in my prayers. HUGS!

  4. Wendy, if she can't rally, I hope and pray that it is as gentle a passing as possible for your mother.

    Today is my mother's birthday, She would have been 94. We lost her at this time 31 years ago. Yes,it is hard. My heart is with you.

    1. Thank you. It is hard losing a loved one at any time but especially during the holidays. I thank God each day that Mom is comfortable and in no pain. She is slowly fading away but has held on much longer than I anticipated.


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